word salad.

To Infinity and Bed, Bath, and Beyond
August 27, 2009, 10:17 pm
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review_buzzm_3I just made a course: Job Interview Success. You could honestly get almost any job you want as long as you can pull of a good interview. It’s not easy, but it’s doable. With my interview skills, I could probably get hired as an astrophysicist. Once they hired me and asked me to do something, they’d be sorely dissatisfied, but that’s not the point I’m trying to make. What I am trying to say is the economy is rough stuff right now, and you have to be able to set yourself apart from the rest of the rat race.

Don’t get the wrong impression. The idea isn’t to bluff you’re way through a job interview, because hopefully you’re not applying for something that you aren’t qualified for. The idea is to present who you are genuinely and know how to talk yourself up without sounding like a royal snot-bag (Doesn’t my shifting vocabulary impress you?). Strangely, one of the most intense interviews I’ve ever had was for Bed, Bath and Beyond. I went through two interviews, worked there for quite some time, but never bedbathreally figured out what the whole “Beyond” thing was about. It’s was pretty much just Bed and Bath stuff. I’ll give you a hint for anyone looking to shift into a career at the triple B: don’t do it. It mostly includes climbing very high ladders. Not only was it awesome due to my lack of coordination, I actually almost met my end top stocking a very heavy mixing bowl. I just remember the interview suggested that most of my goals and dreams for the future should include comforters, bath mats, and curtains. Somehow despite sharing none of those enthusiasms, I was still hired.


Sharing is Caring
August 26, 2009, 3:56 pm
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LearningZenLogoAre you interested in sharing what you know? Gaining personal credibility? Creating a following? Building your network?

If so, this opportunity is for you! LearningZen.com is looking for course authors who would like to share their knowledge and contribute to the greater good.

Our mission at LearningZen is to enable people to grow personally and professionally through training and education. We are dedicated to creating a user based community for small businesses, nonprofit organizations, government agencies and individuals to educate, learn, and collaborate. Unlike many similar platforms our services are completely free to both students and educators, as we truly stand by our mission and believe knowledge should be free to those who desire it.

We are searching for people with vast knowledge that they would like to share. Courses will only be limited by imagination and the base of information you have to offer. I promise there is no gimmick or trap to this; we are real people who are passionate about learning. So if you have a passion, come to LearningZen.com and share it!

Happy Friday!
August 21, 2009, 4:50 pm
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Friday. I don’t think it’s possible to wake up on the wrong side of the bed on a Friday. I’m sure some would disagree, mainly those that work weekends, but to me; anything short of losing a limb could happen on a Friday and I’d be okay with it. It’s not that I plan overly elaborate and ambitious activities, and now with the puppy sleeping in is obsolete…it’s just the shear fact that I can sit on my couch and do nothing that’s so appealing to me. I can wake up slow, cook myself a plate of bacon for breakfast, and getting “ready” means throwing on a pair of torn up jeans and ratty tee-shirt (I’m incredibly fashion-forward).

4402_542946648727_32601000_32466224_4488829_nWeekend Tanya is very different from Weekday Tanya. Weekday Tanya is all biz, while Weekend Tanya does everything outside but sleep. She wears a lot of tie-dye, goes to the Farmer’s Market but never buys anything, and frolics around canyons like a mountain goat. Not to say it’s a completely other persona and I have any kind of split personality, but Friday-Sunday is a different pace of life.

I doubt anyone disagrees. Speaking of such things like working, I made another course on the free site (my third) about job interview tips and tricks. I’m kind of a fan of making courses on topics that just have way to much information floating around on the inter-web. I like to take it all and compile it into  a nice and neat little package. I think everyone has their own reason for being a “digital sharecropper“.2894_541281470757_32601000_32393381_848660_n

I still haven’t decided what I’m doing this weekend. In any event, it will most likely include me using bacon as fake walrus tusks in my mouth. Sadly, this is one of many pictures of me performing this action. Tonight Koda gets her shots, which means we can finally start to introduce her to other dogs. When she first came to us two weeks ago, she immediately cowered if she saw another dog. However, now it’s all I can do to hold her back. In related news, she is growing like a weed!

Doctor D
August 19, 2009, 3:55 pm
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Yesterday my cat scared the bejesus of me when he took it upon himself to take a nap on my laptop, and somehow managed to hit a key that started playing a youtube video.

Now this wasn’t just any youtube video. If you look closely you can barely make out our Chief Financial Officer, Dennis Phillips, in a graduation cap and gown.

I won’t lie. I may have been part of the team that put him up to the challange, but I don’t think any of us thought he would ever go through with it.

Without further ado, Dennis Phillips-Ph.D rapping about LearningZen:

Pollen…otherwise known as the bane of my existence
August 17, 2009, 10:26 pm
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Is awesome. Oh, did I say awesome? Because what I actually meant to say, is this sucks…a lot. Pardon my grown-up and mature language, but this is pretty much what the allergy report has said for the last two months in good old Salt Lake City. I honestly have not had allergy symptoms for so long, that I had actually forgotten that I suffered from them. Perhaps being situated in the third floor of an apartment building downtown had shielded me from these horrible offenders last summer. Now that I’ve moved on to the glory that is suburbia I have grass, weeds, trees, and all sorts of magnificent allergy provokers to immerse myself in. After sixty days of some invigorating post nasal drip, I finally went to the Doctor who equipped me with a small army of drugs. Usually, I’m all about taking a holistic approach, but unfortunately no amount of yoga and patchouli could help this time.

simpsons_crazycatladyShe also gave me the scare of my life when she said; “Maybe your allergic to cats”. This was not a reality for me. I think my heart literally skipped a beat. Luckily when I informed her I had two of my own, she comforted me in saying that if they were the source of my allergies, I would know it.

Phew! Anyone who knows me, know I aspire to one day be  the “Crazy Cat Lady” from the Simpsons. This would have foiled my plans for sure. I really can’t wait to throw my cat’s at all the neighborhood hooligans…that’ll show them. I’m going to have to acquire a few more furry friends in order to make this dream come true. Tucker has put on a bit of weight in the last year which has made him significantly less aerodynamic. Penny on the other hand, is so skinny I fear if I threw her she’d end up in California.

The Greatest Love of All
August 12, 2009, 10:13 pm
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It’s been a fairly busy week so far. I actually looked forward to the usual slew of Monday meetings this week because we were in serious need of a re-group. Post OR and Oshkosh, we hadn’t formally been able to follow-up and set goals for the coming sprint. Now that I’ve got that under my belt, I feel much more centered.


Besides the usual stress of a workday, I’ve now got a puppy thrown into the mix. Yes, after mercilessly posting pictures of the puppy I did not yet have for weeks, I finally got the little furball. And isn’t that picture just glorious? Although it appears I took her to Sears and got the “Mountain-view” background as opposed to the laser background, that was actually just taken in Sugarhouse Park.

I’m proud to report that she isn’t a total terror, and in actuality; is a really, really good puppy. The first few days she was convinced that the guest room was the most suitable toilet but she’s starting to opt for the great outdoors. She seldom whines and although they are yet to reciprocate her feelings-she wants to be best friends with the cats. They spend most of their time cowering in their kitty condo, glaring at me with a “What is that, and why did you bring it into my house” look. I have faith they’ll come around.

When I told people I was getting a puppy, everyone told me it was a horrible idea and it was going to be a ton of work. They were right about one thing; I’ll let you take a stab at which one was correct.


In bringing up laser beam background earlier, it reminded me of how after years of begging, my Mother finally let me get it in the third grade. As you can tell, my good looks started a very long time ago. I could tell you just how popular I was, but you wouldn’t even believe it. The next years school picture boasted a new shiny set of braces accompanied by some large, plastic, purple glasses. Like I said, my popularity soared and soared.

I actually had a brief stint being popular in the sixth grade when I mistakenly befriended a girl in my homeroom, but after two years of questionable fashion choices and an obvious lack of boyfriends I was dropped for a lack of coolness. It was a short morning period for both parties involved. I used to feather my hair a lot at the time, or rather-my Mother would. It was technically the 90’s but definitely not the style at Timothy Edwards Middle School.

As far as I’m concerned, popularity shouldn’t even exist at that age. Everyone is too gangly, metal mouthed, and awkward. Sadly, on a slightly more serious note-it’s worse nowadays. My friends little sister looked like she was eighteen by the time she reached eighth grade. Unfortunately, there’s not much you can do as a parent except teach them well and let them lead the way. Show them all the beauty they possess inside…give them a sense of pride to make it easier. Hmmm…That advice sounds familiar, I wonder where I got that from…

Monday, Monday.
August 3, 2009, 9:46 pm
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I was anticipating this picture would look far more dramatic than it actually turned out. Perhaps if you could see the copious amounts of loose papers, flyer’s, pamphlets, and business cards wedged in the bag and pages of every catalogue; you would then understand the point I’m trying to make. The equation is quite simple: Outdoor Retailer’s Conference + AirVenture – The Time To Properly Organize/Follow-Up Between The Two = My desk looking as though a full on tornado has blown through it. While at this point in the day I’ve managed to get a hold over the mess I also had a folder full of e-mails, google alerts, and a majorly clogged RSS feed to deal with. Needless to say, Monday has been an organization overhaul as I’ve attempting to prep myself for what’s ahead. Besides the immense amount of looming follow-up, we’ve also got some demos lined up  this week.

OshKosh, WI was quite the adventure. It was a particularly interesting experience for someone like myself, whose airplane knowledge basically ends at knowing they fly in the air. While there were War Birds, helicopters doing seemingly impossible aerial feats, and amazing air shows at the end of each day; two attractions peaked my attention more than the others.

The first was the world’s largest commercial jet: The Airbus A380. I really can’t express how massive this thing was. It can hold over 500 people! There was also a flight demonstration where I watched in something between amazment and horror, waiting for the giant careening aircraft to fall down from the sky (of course, it never did).
ht_virgin_galactic2_080123_ms The other “not to be missed” attraction for me was seeing the “Virgin Galatic.” Even the name was cool. I will try my best to cohertly explain this vessel, and by that I mean I will heavily rely on the wikipedia entry about it. Basically it is a small plane (it can hold six people) that can go “above and beyond” normal aircrafts. It can overlap the Earth’s atomsphere at about 70,000 feet and can make a sub-orbital journey with a short period of weightlessness in which passengers would be able to float around the cabin.

That’s a plane that demands respect! Now even YOU could go into space. Which Nsync member was supposed to go into space…Lance Bass? They should give him a one way ticket.

In related news, this is exciting:


It may not be the most astounding or staggering set of statistics in the world, but it puts a big smile on my face.